*Untitled*

So yesterday Bae  said that she wants to get married next year. Totally took me off guard!!! Started asking me all types of questions... what types of wedding ring I'd want... Now my mind is all messed up! lol...

SN: sex last night was... TOO damn good... I was knocked out cold! messing with her and that damn peanut! lol

Anyway...  I've been thinking about colors and places... ugh.. I mean I'm not much of a planner... But I'm really anxious... not to mention I want Toya as my forever... I keep thinking about a wedding without my mom... What kind of wedding would that be?? But I guess... its something I'll have to deal with when the time comes....

I was really taken a back when she bought  it up to me... Like its random conversation to tell someone you wanna marry them next year! WTH! Tallking bout I'm not getting any younger! REALLY!?!?! WTFH!? a mess... 

Random...

             How can mother's day be without a mother? Without that one person who is always in your corner... always willing to lend her ear and never bring the conversation back to her... always let her life be about her children? The best anyone has ever had... she has her own holiday and isn't around to let me celebrate her...  I miss my mom so much... I miss talking to her every morning before I go to work... or late at night when I'm frustrated....  who is going to be here to give me wisdom now? What am I to do?